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How To Lean On Your Support System When You’re In A Funk

Funks happen to all of us. We are going through a rough time, we recently lost someone, we turned the news on, or we just woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

It happens. We feel like there is a dark cloud hovering over us that does not leave and instead just moves alongside us. It feels like the light is never in sight. It feels like nothing will ever go right again.

As you can tell, I have been there. And I’m sure that you have as well.

It’s so important during these times to lean on your support system. You should not go through it alone, in fact, it will probably not help if you go through it alone. You need people to listen to you, to reassure you, and to help you put things into perspective.

But, it’s not always easy to ask for help and reach out to those people. However, that’s what friends and family are for – to be there for each other in both the good times, and the bad.

How can we lean on our support systems when we are in a funk?

How To Lean On Your Support System When You’re In A Funk

1. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.

This may seem really obvious, but it needs to be said. You need to reach out and ask for help. People do not check in daily (or they rarely do).

We all have our own lives going on, and we are not always conscious of what is fully going on in other people’s lives. But that does not mean that your friends and family do not want to be there for you – I guarantee that they do.

Shoot them a text, tell them how you are feeling, and I am sure they will answer and help you out. And if they don’t? Well, I guess you know who your real support system is.

2. Be honest with them.

Be honest with them both about what is wrong and what you need from them. If you need them to come over and watch sappy movies with you and have a good cry, tell them. Or if you need to get out of your house and you don’t care where you go, tell them. If you just need them to listen, tell them.

Be direct, in a kind way, to further ensure you are getting the support you want and need. But remember, it is important that they know what is going on, even if you do not want to talk about it, so they can fully help you.

3. Remind yourself that this is what friends are for.

I cannot stress this enough – being there for someone does not just mean being there for them in the good times, it’s about being there int he bad times as well.

You are friends with someone because you care about them, and vice versa, they care about you. True friends want you to be happy, and will want to get you out of your funk. Remind yourself of all of this, and it will make leaning on them even easier.

4. No one can handle everything. 

I use to think I could handle everything, I really did. Throw an obstacle my way, and I will likely handle it without crying. But, I quickly learned as I worked my way through my twenties that this in fact is not possible.

There is no human on this planet that can physically, mentally, and emotionally handle everything.

It took me a while to not only realize this, but to also realize that no one was expecting me to handle everything (contrary to what I had believed). We all need help. In the words of the Beatles, “I get by with a little help from my friends.” 

5. Know that this is not one-sided.

If you feel guilty that your friend is stuck hearing about your problems, do not let it be one-sided. Their time will come where they will need a support system, and you will be there for them, hands down. That’s what a support system is.

We all go through rough times, and we will be there for each other to help get through these times. There is no reason to feel guilty about opening up to someone you trust, as one day, you will likely be there for them as well.

6. They are your support system for a reason.

And that reason is because they love you, they care for you, and they want you to be happy. They will do everything in their power to put that smile back on your face and show you that you will be smiling again. It’s okay to lean on them now, they will be okay with it.

Reaching out tends to be the hardest part. Try to remember that it’s hard for the majority of people. And know that you are not alone, and that you do not need to go through your funk alone.

About the Author

Michelle Ioannou

Michelle graduated from Fordham University with a Bachelors of Arts '13 and a Master of Arts '14. She's currently working in corporate America with a side of freelance writing. She wants you to learn from her experiences and mistakes so your 20s can be your best decade. When she's not working, she's likely planning her escape to a tropical island.