13 Signs You're Growing Even If It Doesn't Feel Like It

Your twenties are a decade of rapid growth. But it's happening so fast - and happening all at once - that you may not even feel like, or see signs you're growing at all. In your twenties, you're navigating things like first jobs, "adult" friendships, relationships, independence, and a quarter-life crisis, all while trying to figure out this thing called adulthood.

Don't knock it - that's a lot! How can you even tell that you're growing as a person, when you're so busy trying to navigate all of that and more?

When we think of personal growth, we tend to imagine it like a movie montage - new jobs, dream apartments, healthy relationships, maybe even an engagement ring. We associate personal growth as suddenly having life figured out. But in reality, that's not what it is.

Real growth often looks like crying in your car after work, saying no to plans, unfollowing someone who makes you feel bad and realizing you don't actually enjoy the things you thought you were supposed to do. But let's be honest, no one is posting all of that on social media.

Doubt You're Growing? These Signs Show It

Growth usually feels uncomfortable, and that's because it's happening while you're still in the middle of it. If you've been feeling stuck lately, here are some signs that you're probably growing more than you realize.

1) You're More Self-Aware

Instead of just running on autopilot, you actually notice your habits. You've started catching yourself overthinking. You can recognize when you're projecting.

You're realizing why certain people trigger you. Your thoughts have shifted from "everyone hates me" to "actually.. I haven't eaten today and I'm catastrophizing."

2) You Set Boundaries, Even When It's Awkward

You're more comfortably saying no. You leave work on time and are protecting your weekends. You don't have FOMO and you're okay declining invitations.

In the past, you might have invented elaborate excuses not to go somewhere or to do something. Now, you simply say "I can't make it, but thanks for inviting me" and know that is sufficient.

3) You Care Less About Impressing Everyone

You can go on social media without comparing yourself to what you see on others' Instagram stories. You've stopped logging into LinkedIn and comparing yourself to that person from college who just posted about their promotion. You no longer need the external validation that you once did.

Instead you're now buying clothes because you like them, not because an influencer said you must have them to be on trend. You're choosing a practical card that fits your budget rather than a flashy one. You're straight up skipping trends that don't fit you and that you don't like. And you're okay with all of this.

4) You Recover Faster From Bad Days is a Sign You're Growing

We're not saying that you no longer struggle. We are saying that instead of letting things like on ebad meeting ruin your entire week, now it only ruins your afternoon. Sure, it still bothers you, but not for nearly as long as it used to. And yes, that's definitely progress.

5) You Apologize Without Making Excuses

Emotional maturity is a huge personal growth, especially in your twenties. Instead of apologizing and saying "I'm sorry BUT..." you fully own up to your apology and say things like "You're right. I handled that poorly. I'm sorry."

6) You've Become Pickier About Who Gets Your Time

You've also realized that this isn't antisocial behavior. Instead, it's you growing and realizing that not every friendship is meant to last forever.

When it comes to friends, you also tend to realize in your twenties that quality is more important than quantity. You also learn to protect your peace, too, and that could mean cutting people out of your life.

7) You're Comfortable Being Alone is a Sign You're Growing

In the past, being alone may have felt like a failure. But now, it feels liberating. It's a way to show yourself some self-love and do the things you want to do.

It's the things like trying that restaurant you've been eyeing or heading to the movie solo. It could also be as big as traveling solo or as simple as spending Saturday at home.

8) You Celebrate Other People's Success

You've learned that other people's success don't hinder your own. In the past you may have thought that if they got promoted, you never will. But now you know that their success doesn't cancel yours.

9) You Ask for Help is a Sign You're Growing

We have this misconception that independence means doing everything yourself, btu that's not true. Real maturity looks like asking your coworkers questions, going to therapy, calling your parents and hiring someone when needed.

10) Your Definition of Success Has Changed

As you grow, what you see as successful changes. For instance, in your early 20s, you may associate success with an impressive LinkedIn title.

However, as you go through the decade and reach your later 20s, you may chance that definitely of success to having a great work-life balance and getting eight hours of sleep.

11) You're Spending More Intentionally

Instead of buying random Amazon purchases every week or whatever your favorite influencer is promoting from TikTok shop, you're spending your money differently.

You're doing things like investing, saving for travel, and paying off debt. Instead of spending your money on things that are immediate gratification, you're focusing on the delayed gratification.

12) You're Becoming Comfortable With Uncertainty is a Sign You're Growing

One of the biggest lessons you learn in your twenties is that life rarely goes according to plan. Growth is realizing that uncertainty isn't failure, it's just uncertainty.

Some examples of this include not having a five-year-plan, job searching and dating. You're trying to figure it all out, rather than having it figured out, and that's what your twenties are for.

13) You Bounce Back After Rejection

Rejection is going to happen. The sooner you accept that, the easier it will be. There will be times you didn't get that internship or promotion or apartment or house or second date.

Instead of turning this on yourself and thinking that you're not good enough, flip that perspective. Think to yourself "that one wasn't for me." This is real growth.

Final Thoughts on How You May Not Be Noticing the Signs You're Growing

Growing up in your twenties means learning more about who you are and what makes you happy. You learn that it is okay to say no to people, ask for help, and take breaks when you feel overwhelmed.

Instead of trying to impress everyone else, you focus on spending your time and money on things that actually matter to you. Best of all, when bad days or mistakes happen, you learn to bounce back faster without being too hard on yourself.

Over time these changes happen and despite being so crucial they can often go unnoticed. Take the time to look at yourself and discover these signs of your growth. Celebrate the person you're becoming as life speeds by.

About the Author

---