How to Build Confidence in Your First “Real” Job

There is so much excitement when you get your first real job. But with that comes a lot of nerves, too. Imposter syndrome can fully kick in, inducing lowkey panic. So if you want to know how to build confidence in your first “real” job, know you’re not alone.

Thoughts like “why did they hire me?” and “how does everyone else know what they’re doing” will likely cross your mind more than once. You may think you’re the only person to feel like this. But trust us, it’s totally normal. Fortunately, there are easy ways to build confidence in your first “real” job.

Finding Confidence When You Are Feeling Incompetent

Confidence isn’t something you have off the bat – especially when it comes to your career. It’s something you build, and if you’re just starting out, you haven’t nearly had the time or experience to build it just yet. So how can you build that confidence in your first “real” job? Here’s how.

1) Accept That You’re Supposed To Be New

You may feel like you’re behind, but you’re not. You’re only just beginning! You may feel like you’re expected to know everything, but most times, that’s a pressure you’re just putting on yourself; no one in the office expects you to know everything on day one or even week one.

Companies hire entry-level employees knowing they need to learn; if they wanted someone who already knew things, they would’ve hired someone mid-career or more senior. Once you accept all of this and stop expecting perfect, you’ll notice that your confidence will grow faster.

2) Ask Questions to Build Confidence in Your First “Real” Job

Even when it may feel awkward, ask questions. For some reason, we have this misconception that asking questions shows weakness. It doesn’t, it actually shows competence.

Holding back questions will actually slow down your learning, your confidence, and potentially even your advancement. In reality, most managers prefer questions over silent confusion.

Sure, if you’re asking a question that you’ve already been given the answer to, or if you’re asking a question that you can easily find the answer to, that’s annoying. Here’s a little cheat for you – everyone Googles things at work, constantly.

To help when it comes to asking the question:

1. Write questions down first
2. Try to solve it on your own first (that can include using Google or your company’s Intranet site)
3. If you can’t solve it on your own, then ask
4. Make sure you are concise when asking

3) Focus On Small Wins, Not Big Perfection

As we mentioned above, confidence is something you build. You may not think much of the small wins you accomplish, but it’s those small wins that’ll help you build your confidence. That first finished task, that first piece of positive feedback, that first time you figure something out alone are all things that’ll help you build up you confidence.

Keep a “wins list” on your phone or notes app. Your brain tends to forget progress and fixates on mistakes, which is why having a list is good to reference whenever Imposter Syndrome hits. As you get into the habit of doing this, you’ll quickly build that confidence you’ve been wanting to tap into in your first real job.

4) Learn How To Take Feedback Without Spiraling

We learn from feedback and constructive criticism. Yet, our immediate gut reaction when we get feedback is to get defensive and/or take it personally. Feedback doesn’t mean failure! Remember, someone only takes the time and energy to offer constructive criticism when they see value in investing in you.

Another thing? Separate your work form your identity. You are not your job, despite how blurry the lines may get sometimes. Finally, ask clarifying questions when receiving feedback rather than just shutting down or becoming defense.

If you really want to show your manager how seriously you’re taking their remarks, follow up later to show how you applied the feedback. This will give you an instant confidence boost, too.

5) Stop Comparing Yourself To Others 5+ Years Ahead Of You

Sure, that colleague five years older than you may seem like your equal. But they have five years experience on you, and in the workplace, that is a lot. You’re basically comparing your start to someone else’s middle.

Whenever you start comparing yourself to your coworkers, remind yourself that they have years – not just days or months – of experience under their belt. Focus on your own growth curve, rather than someone else’s.

People’s paths tend to be different, even at the same company. Another piece of advice? Take everything you see on social media, especially LinkedIn, with a grain of salt. People tend to exaggerate their success online.

6) Build Relationships At Work to Build Confidence in Your Job

A huge way to build confidence in yourself is by looking at the people around you. If you feel comfortable around them, and if they feel comfortable around you and come to you to ask for things, you should feel really proud of yourself.

Some ways you can build up these workplace relationships? Talk to coworkers beyond just tasks. We’re not saying you have to become BFFs, but knowing a few “personal” details about them can go a long away. Having casual chats with folks rather than structured meetings can help reduce intimidation, too.

Additionally, find one “go-to” person for questions. This can be someone you lean on, who’s open to helping you. Work will feel less scary to you once people start feeling familiar.

7) Feel Comfortable Saying “I Don’t Know (Yet)”

As we mentioned above, no one – or at the very least, most people – won’t expect you to have all the answers right away. It’s okay to tell someone that you don’t know something yet or you’re unsure of how to do something yet. Honesty builds trust.

This is way better than pretending and guessing wrong. However, instead of just saying “sorry, I don’t know how to do that yet,” add a line like “but I can find out” or “I’ll look into it” to show that you’re willing to learn. Once you do learn, you’ll be adding more evidence to your confidence, too.

8) Give It Time

When it comes to building confidence, time is key. Confidence is a slow build, not something that happens right away in your first job. The first 3-6 months tend to be awkward for everyone, and this phase is temporary. But, know that things will eventually start to “click” gradually.

Final Thoughts on How to Build Confidence in Your First “Real” Job

As you feel uncertain in your new job, give yourself grace. This is a natural feeling especially if this is your first big job in your career. Let yourself be present in your work and gradually apply practices like these that will help you feel more confident.

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