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Young and Hitched: Navigating Friendships Post-Wedding


It should come as no surprise that in this day and age, many people are waiting until their late twenties, and beyond, to tie the knot.

In this ever-changing social climate, people of all genders, sexual orientations, and romantic mindsets are breaking free of old world marital traditions. But what about those who do get married in their early twenties? We can tell you that it doesn’t mean you are old school or are selling yourself short.

There are many, many reasons an individual might choose to wait to get married, just as there are many reasons someone may not wait. Of those who chose to wait, many are focusing on their careers or seeing what (and who) is out there. Some may be going to grad school or even traveling the world. In any case, marriage is often getting pushed lower and lower on the to-do list.

While weddings are fun (albeit, stressful) events to plan and attend, things might change drastically after the big day. Your new partner for life becomes your home base–the person you see and speak to daily as well as share the little moments of your life with now. Thus, one of the hardest things about married life is maintaining relationships with your friends.

Some of your friends might still be single or in fleeting relationships. It isn’t going to be as fun to hit the bars with them as they vie for attention when they are the only ones doing it. When we are  young, many people have only their own interests at heart. If they spot a potential suitor, don’t put it past them to ditch you. You can still maintain your friendships; all it takes is an environment change. Instead of meeting for drinks, plan a girls dinner or have a wine night in your apartment. You will be able to catch up and have a good time without all of the distractions of a bar.

Another thing that changes? Your friends don’t want to hear about your sex life. It reminds them of their parents (and who wants to think about that?). Remember back when you were single or had just begun dating your beau and they wanted all of the dirty details? Those days are long gone, especially if they also know your spouse. Of course your friends will be concerned if you are happy, they might even be a bit overly interested if there is a problem, but they just don’t want to hear about it on the regular anymore. Our advice? Spend more time with your love between the sheets.

You’re interests are also going to start to grow and diverge. Hopefully, you and your other half will pick up new hobbies together. You’ll also start to pick up new pastimes of your own that revolve around married life. Whether you are decorating your home, romantic getaway planning,  learning how to cook for two or planning for a family, these things will take up more of your time–leaving less time for your old single-life activities. Embrace it, you’ll likely meet new people who share your new interests and are interested in your new married life.

These changes are going to happen whenever you get married, but they are especially pronounced when you are young and the majority of your friends are still living the single life. Be prepared for some friction, but most importantly, enjoy your newly, wedded bliss–it’s a wonderfully happy time in your life.

About the Author

Nicole Booz

Nicole Booz is the founder and Editor-in-Chief of GenTwenty, GenThirty, and The Capsule Collab. She has a Bachelor of Science in Psychology and is the author of The Kidult Handbook (Simon & Schuster May 2018). She currently lives in Pennsylvania with her husband and two sons. When she’s not reading or writing, she’s probably hiking, eating brunch, or planning her next great adventure.


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