The Not-So-Magnificent Side of Living With Your Significant Other

Moving in with your significant other can be one of the best days ever. That moment when the two of you are alone in your new apartment or house with the keys for the first time is exhilarating. You look at each other, both thinking, Holy shit!!!!!!!

It’s easy for the excitement to wear off, though. You considered how the rent would be paid, how the two of you would handle groceries, the furniture that falls into the “need” category as opposed to the “would like” category, and how you’d try to find a happy medium for your individual sleep cycles.

Never did you think about what would happen when one of you gets an upset stomach or eats something that wreaks havoc on your digestive system.  Everybody uses the restroom, sure, but making repeat visits in a half-hour span is suspicious, along with barricading yourself inside for 20 minutes at a time. There’s nothing wrong with your partner knowing that greasy burgers makes you clutch at your stomach and run, it’s just…embarrassing.

This is the root of a great deal of problems with living with your significant other. Like, what if you’re having your period and you leak through your clothes and onto the sheets in the night. It’s not a big deal—it’s happened to every lady at least once. Rip off those sheets, rinse in cold water, spray with some stain remover, and toss in the laundry. Done. When your S.O. is part of the picture though, you can’t help but want to die when you find red smudges on your sheets.

Weird habits—or quirks, if you want to be cute—also become magnified when living with your lover. You like to come home and stand in front of the refrigerator with the freezer door open while eating ice cream straight from the carton. When your partner catches you doing this for the first time you stop, mid-bite, to stare at them with wide eyes. You aren’t a glutton…even though you maybe feel like it just a little bit.

Maybe you like to wear every piece of clothing two or three times before washing them. You didn’t get dirty or sweat a ton while wearing them, so why not give them another go before condemning them to the laundry basket? But maybe your S.O. wears everything only once before washing it. Maybe you’re used to keeping your sorta-dirty clothes in an organized mountain on the floor at the foot of the bed. Your face burns with shame whenever your partner has to detour around said mountain to get to the other side of the room.

You get paranoid about being perceived as a sloth. When was the last time you did the dishes, or took out the garbage, or cleaned the bathroom? What if your lover thinks you’re a slob?

There’s also the issue of privacy. Some people thrive on always being around others. And then there are the precious introverts of the world, those who can handle crowds and BFFs, but do need some time to recharge every now and then. How do you find your me-time? How do you tell your partner you need some time to yourself every now and then without sounding rude or like you’re leaving them?

Perhaps the worst part of living with your significant other is knowing that you’ll either always be with them…or not. This may not be so relevant for people who are married, but for those of us just dating it can be an incredibly daunting idea. This is either the person you’ll live with forever, or something will go very wrong and you’ll find yourself dividing up your stuff and hauling out of there.

It might sound like a lot of negativity, but there is a bright side. If your significant other is the person you’ll end up with forever…you need all this awkward, not-so-magnificent stuff. You need to learn about their quirks and weird habits. You need to become comfortable with the way you each do things and handle situations.

The most important thing though: these little embarrassments and oddities shouldn’t be a big deal. It’s okay to feel like a weirdo the first few times you’re caught making spaghetti for breakfast, and it’s normal to blush fifty shades of red the first few times your digestive tract encounters something it doesn’t agree with. After these initial moments though, it shouldn’t be a big deal anymore. Ice cream for breakfast is just something that you do, and you will wash all your clothes when you’re ready to.

If these things are always treated like a big deal, it’s absolutely your cue to pack up ship and get out. If your significant other isn’t cool with these random, not-so-magnificent things, they most definitely don’t deserve all the good stuff.

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